Wrangling Abortion With a Hangman's Noose

I was sitting here, casually reading the CNN home page.  There was an article about Troy Davis, someone on death row in Texas.  I can’t debate if he was guilty or not, I have no idea about his particular case.  But I did just had a pretty important epiphany of sorts.  

 I don’t believe in the death penalty, at least I don't think I do.  Let's work with this:

I don’t have the whole solution for punishing the guilty in our society or anything; But I do know that people don’t deserve to die for the mistakes that they do.  More to the point:  Eye for an eye, is wrong. 

How I came to this, was an oddball memory, that happened to fire off, just as I was reading the article. 

When I was playing football in high school, we were doing inter-team scrimmage, just to practice all our plays and things.  One of the things we practice, of course, is getting off on the snap.  Just as important as getting off quick as the ball is snapped, is waiting until the ball is snapped.  When the QB calls for a long snap count, before the ball is hiked, it is usually with the hopes of drawing the defensive team offside.  But sometimes it backfires, and this own teammates, so used to going on a relatively short cadence call, will jump offside first. 

Well, that was happening that day.  Several times as a matter of fact.  Not me, but someone a few positions down from me, I think the opposite guard or something.  Anyways, the guy on defense, right across from me, was someone I went to grade school with, Ed.  He was second string, and was going against us, the first string.  Every time the guy on my side jumped at the wrong time.  Ed took it upon himself to go like hell at me.  Smashing into me, making a bunch of noise.  Now, I was waiting for the proper count to go, and was not moving as he ran into me.  It didn’t hurt me, Ed was about 160 pounds maybe at the time, and I was more like 220.  He did knock me back a few steps, and he just kept on going at me, until one of the coaches blew a whistle at him. 

This happened twice.  The second time, our coach, a man awesomely called Vance, told him to “Quit it!”. 

The next time it happened a few plays later though; there he went, going like hell at me.  I basically just stood back with a WTF look, as he did his darndest to flail at me and push me around. 

This time, the line coach got pissed at him, and called him front and center.  Yelling at him about why he thought it was ok and such.  I knew why he was doing it, it wasn’t personal on me, he was trying to show intensity, drive, etc.  He wanted to prove he should be on first string.  Heck, we all did.

Well, the coach called me over there too, and had Ed get down in his stance in front of me.  Coach looked at me, and told me to get him.   And Ed wasn’t allowed to be defensive, to just take it from me.  The coach thought I deserved it I guess.  Payback. 

I didn’t really want to.  Ed wasn’t my best friend, but I liked him just fine.  I didn’t want to wallop him like that.  Certainly not in front of everyone, as a ‘lesson’ type thing.  After I balked a bit, the coach talked me into doing it.  I did it kind of halfheartedly.  I tried to look convincing though.  But I didn’t like it.  So he made me do it again.  And after that, he had me do it again.  I felt awful about it.

I was 16, what was I going to do?  Say no?  Well, my hindsight says yes, I should have.  It would have been pretty character building to do so.  Maybe even talk to the coach after he punished me for disobeying him.  Tell him how I didn't think it was ok for him to use me as his tool of justice like that.  That if I had a problem with Ed, then I'd deal with it myself.  But, I didn't.

I’m not into the eye for an eye thing.  At least when it directly involves me.  If someone steals from me, I’d like my stuff back.  If someone hits me, I’d really prefer it if they stop.  I’m not all about personal justice.  So if I was killed by someone, whether they did it on purpose or not, I wouldn’t want them to die for it.  Everyone screws up.  It's actually a part of our nature.  We make mistakes, errors in judgment, or simply get it into our heads that a certain thing is the best way to go.

That, after some though, really only applies to when I'm involved as the victim.  I don't think I'd be as forgiving, at least at first, if it involved someone close to me, and I was powerless to stop it.  I might be out for blood.

It's hard to say if I would get to the point that I forgave someone enough that they should get a second chance on something like that.  Especially if it was intentional.

It is said, that those that are anti death penalty, yet are pro choice on abortion, are being fairly hypocritical.  I can't argue with the logic.  Especially since personal events in my life have given me some perspective on that.

I am still pro choice.  For the simple fact that everyone needs to make their own decisions, and shouldn't be facing death, from infection or tissue damage, from a botched job; as payment for doing it.  They should be able to access the proper facilities to get the job done right.  And then be free to live with their choice. 

I'm not saying every woman who has an abortion will think it's a mistake.  But some do, and I'm thinking of them in this.

After all, humanity's ability to learn, especially from our mistakes, is one of our best attributes.  Learning from a mistake gives you the ability to be a better person going forward, and to pass on your knowledge.  Living on as a member of society afterwards, gives one the chance to contribute, and try to make amends for mistakes, if that is what is needed.

Being put to death, rotting in a jail cell forever, or dying in a back alley after an abortion. 

Those things offer little hope for redemption. 

Those things ultimately offer no solace for the victims.

Those things don't unmake a mistake.

And thusly, are my two major issues of the Death Penalty, and Abortion Rights; brought a little more into focus.  At least for me.

I still don't know though, if I wouldn't want capital punishment for someone who killed a child of mine.  And I hope I never have to find out.

Cheers, to preserving that mystery.

EDIT - Addition on 3/26/2019

I posted a link to this on Google + back when it was new, and I just now stumbled upon the post, along with some thoughtful comments, from none other than my best friend on Earth (and, let's be honest, my wife from another life).  Since Google + will no longer be around, and all its contents purged in a week or so from now, I have added them here.  Comments to follow:

HER: What a thoughtful post! I read a statistic years ago that said that most pro-death penalty people are anti-choice... it stuck with me and it appears to be still holding true.
I don't get that. But then, maybe my anti-death penalty, pro-choice stance is just as questionable.
I always say I'm against the death penalty because I can't explain to Sage how killing can be right, how it's not vengeance, but justice...because it is vengeance, and in my head that's not right.
I waver on some things, like people who habitually molest or kill kids - but I think that's just me reacting to my own past. I'm angry that my past makes me want some level of vengeance, instead of justice, when I feel it is so wrong.
Plus, I can't see a way to proving that every single convicted criminal on death row is 100% guilty... As the saying goes, I'd rather a guilty man go free...
As for the abortion thing. You know I'm open and won't lie that I've been there... thank God for the life I have now, and for the ability to have come through it safely, because I wouldn't have a life like this if I hadn't had an abortion. I think i would have sought it, no matter if it was legal or not. I know women who found their way to illegal abortions back before it was legal, and thankfully lived through the horror of it.
Some women will always be faced with what they feel are desperate situations, and take that as a reproductive choice - they continue to do so whether it's legal or not. I'd rather that these daughters, mothers, sisters, don't die from what is already a difficult choice.
Anyway, I guess what I'm saying is that I agree with you, both of these subjects are close to my heart and have a lot of effect on my political choices. Hopefully I make those choices with some level of wisdom and respect for all of my fellow (wo)man and their needs.
Sorry it ended up so long. xx

HER: and btw, Coach was an asshole for putting a kid like you into that position. So there!

ME: I appreciate the length and breadth of your comment. Don't apologize. I'm still not clear on the details of how I think about both things. You know of my history on the one. And as far as the other, perhaps what you and I have both alluded to is true. That the victim, or the survivor (s) are not equipped to be the ones who determine what justice really is for a given situation. As crappy as that is. :(

I cannot help but think that there is a better solution for law breakers in general than the current justice system and it's institutionalized prison system. Some people come out of it better for it in some way. But the majority do not. It's just a grinder for humanity it seems.

HER: This is something i read recently, and it touches on justice/forgiveness etc. You may find it interesting.

http://www.chabad.org/library/article_cdo/aid/1010092/jewish/Should-We-Forgive-the-Nazis.htm

HER: Now the reason I link that, is it has a different perspective - that only the person who has been sinned against (for lack of a better word) can determine what forgiveness is possible and what justice is. It brings up an interesting questions - because as you say - perhaps the victim or survivor may not be the best qualified... but then, who is. Especially for something so final as death.